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19 Jan It's pretty obvious you're about to hook up for the first time, and you feel all types of ways. Avoid them, and you should have yourself one heck of a time. But it's a good idea to have a general idea, lest anyone's feelings get hurt — especially if you're very invested in the relationship and whether or not it. 28 Jun Generally speaking, one person always ends up wanting more than the other, and that means that hurt feelings will almost always ensue. However, I'd be feel like you fell in love. To get as little oxytocin on, you have to make a point of avoiding actions that increase this hormone before, during, or after sex. Way to avoid getting attached to your FWB. Once you've found the right guy, communicate the rules and set expectations before jumping into bed for your first hook-up session. 2. Aggressively Stick to calling each other by your first names , and if you catch yourself slipping in a “babe” or “honey”, get out while you can. 5 .

Do hook up for pleasure and excitement, to explore your sexuality and because you want to. Place the emphasis on pleasure and empowerment, and collegiettes everywhere should be having positive hook-up after positive hook-up. Knowing and embracing why hook-ups can leave women feeling crappy is the first step to reversing the curse.

Satisfying hook-ups are totally possible; they just take more than the right motivation and a sex-positive attitude, so read on to find out the things you need to keep in mind in order to have hook-ups you can feel great about.

The biggest key to ensuring a hook-up that will leave you feeling good is to self-assess. Continue reading may sound boring — who wants to do homework before getting down and dirty?

Your well-being prospers when your behavior is consistent with your true desires, attitudes, values and beliefs.

The same, she says, holds true for casual sex. Vrangalova says there are also several personal things to consider before determining if hooking up is right for you. She suggests evaluating yourself before setting out to hook up, taking into consideration your motivations for hooking up, how easily you get and stay aroused, how easily you get attached to sexual partners and how good you are at communicating your desires.

It's a lot of fun, but as someone on his way out, I'm so excited to get the fuck out. For me it took getting to link point where I was old enough to know myself well and genuinely get myself enough to trust my instincts. In college though, a large majority of people are hooking up and aren't looking for any commitment, because its fun to have so many options available. Maybe you can find ways to work around it and manage it, but I'm sure you realize that some people are "clingy" sorts of people I don't mean that in a negative way - they form emotional attachments to people quickly and easily, and sex accelerates and fuels that.

Plain and simple, a reason why a hook-up might leave you feeling mentally poor is because a hook-up left you feeling physically poor. And unfortunately, dissatisfaction from hook-ups is all too common for women.

In a study presented at the International Academy of Sex Research, researchers found that out of college students, women were twice as likely to orgasm during sex in serious relationships as they were during casual hook-ups. One possible explanation for this is that orgasms are the result of communication, and it is much easier to tell a long-term partner exactly how to please you than it is to tell a stranger.

How to NEVER get hurt in a relationship

Not to mention, alcohol is often a factor in college hook-ups, and drunk sex can be sloppy sex not exactly an equation for pleasure. Speaking up for your pleasure has its place in hook-ups, not just long-term relationships.

Go into your hook-ups planning to communicate. We get it—a lot of the time, the point of a hook-up is to have a random, one-time fling, but not all hook-up candidates are click equal. You should seek out a partner who will leave you feeling appreciated and secure.

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No one says your one-night stand has to be dating material, but according to Dr. Vrangalova, there are certain boys who are more likely to make you feel insecure or used after a hook-up, and those are the ones to avoid. How do you spot them? Sexist and slut-shaming men congregate in these environments more than any other college environment. Second, talk to them for a bit and see what their values about gender roles are. Do they love and respect all women, or do they only respect the virginal ones they are going to marry, but not the wild ones they only want to have sex with?

Just pay attention to how he discusses other girls around you. During sexual intercourse, the female brain releases a hormone called oxytocin. Sometimes known as click attachment hormone, oxytocin can induce feelings of love and closeness, so even if you had no romantic interest in your hook-up, your body might trick you into thinking that you do.

Society might be moving in the right direction, but there is still very much a stigma surrounding women who enjoy active sex lives.

How To Avoid Getting Hurt While Hookup

So how can you fight the stigma? Two, try to hook up with guys who will be respectful about your interest in casual sex and won't slut-shame you. Three, be as discreet about your exploits as you need to be given your social environment. Assessing your needs and continue reading, communicating with your partner and being aware of problems that still exist in society is the perfect formula for feeling great about your hook-ups, How To Avoid Getting Hurt While Hookup during and after.

Her journalism poisons of choice are sex, relationships, fitness, entertainment and books especially YAand she's excited to combine these passions somehow in that mythical "real world" everyone keeps talking about.

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He says oh I'm sorry I can't hang out today because my dog is sick and you say cool, talk to you next week, bye. Feelings are hard, I went home with a girl this may and got that "i should call her". I probably agree with most of it. Probably not great advice, I source get emotionally attached very fast, I get bored of people quickly.

By Anna Borges in Dating. Posted May 30 - Tagged hooking up hook-up culture sex.

Keeping It Casual: 9 Ways To Ensure Things Don’t Get Too Serious

Think Before You Do The biggest key to ensuring a hook-up that will leave you feeling good is to self-assess. Learn to Spot a Good Hook-Up Buddy We get it—a lot of the time, the point of a hook-up is to have a random, one-time fling, but not all hook-up candidates are created equal. We make it easier! Sign up for our newsletter to get the best of HC delivered to your inbox.

How To Avoid Getting Hurt While Hookup

About The Author Anna Borges. Editor's Note Are you an aspiring journalist or just looking for an outlet where you can share your voice?